Lemony Snicket

From the back cover: Dear Reader, The word "carnivorous," which appears in the title of this book, means "meat-eating," and once you have read such a bloodthirsty word, there is no reason to read any further. This carnivorous volume contains such a distressing story that consuming any of its contents would be far more stomach-turning than even the most imbalanced meal. To … [Read more...] about The Carnivorous Carnival by Lemony Snicket: B

From the back cover: Dear Reader, Before you throw this awful book to the ground and run as far away from it as possible, you should probably know why. This book is the only one which describes every last detail of the Baudelaire children's miserable stay at Heimlich Hospital, which makes it one of the most dreadful books in the world. There are many pleasant things to read … [Read more...] about The Hostile Hospital by Lemony Snicket: A

From the back cover: Dear Reader, You have undoubtedly picked up this book by mistake, so please put it down. Nobody in their right mind would read this particular book about the lives of Violet, Klaus, and Sunny Baudelaire on purpose, because each dismal moment of their stay in the village of V.F.D. has been faithfully and dreadfully recorded in these pages. I can think of … [Read more...] about The Vile Village by Lemony Snicket: A

From the back cover: Dear Reader, If you have just picked up this book, then it is not too late to put it back down. Like the previous books in A SERIES OF UNFORTUNATE EVENTS, there is nothing to be found in these pages but misery, despair, and discomfort, and you still have time to choose something else to read. Within the chapters of this story, Violet, Klaus, and Sunny … [Read more...] about The Ersatz Elevator by Lemony Snicket: A

From the back cover: Dear Reader, If you are looking for a story about cheerful youngsters spending a jolly time at boarding school, look elsewhere. Violet, Klaus, and Sunny Baudelaire are intelligent and resourceful children, and you might expect that they would do very well at school. Don't. For the Baudelaires, school turns out to be another miserable episode in their … [Read more...] about The Austere Academy by Lemony Snicket: A